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nymphet

Sharn Has Passed On - The Luminous Fog

One reason I haven't been able to post much--? One of my roomies, Sharn, who had cancer, got very sick and was undergoing treatment (chemo and radiation both). She got an infection a month ago that put her in the hospital emergency room, then ICU. She beat the infection, somehow, and was transferred to Oncology. There, her cancer, which was slowed by the 3 treatments she'd undergone, if not put into remission-- went into overdrive. Cat has been at her mother's side, refusing to leave her hospital room, for just over 3 weeks.

Cat's vigil is over. She's coming home at some point tonight. Her mother, Sharn, died at 11:30 pm. That's when the monitors caught it in the hospital in Seattle, and that's when my laptop (the old one, granted) just shut off abruptly for no reason. It startled me, but I really thought it was another sign of my old laptop botching up (though it has never done THAT before!)

That's also when Sharn's clock stopped-- except it stopped at exactly 11:30 am today, a full 12 hours before Sharn died. I've heard of clocks stopping, but at the exact time EARLIER? It was a mantel clock Sharn always wound faithfully until she was confined to her bedroom. Cat was the last one to wind it before going to join her mother at the hospital over 3 weeks ago. The clock started up again this morning, I noticed, which was weird (it ran out its gears a few days ago) but then stopped again at that time. I thought about it (I've heard about personal wind up clocks and death) but shrugged it off.

A few minutes after my laptop died (and I started it up again without a problem) my phone rang-- and I pretty much knew...

Its the dark moon, for one thing. The day and night of death, traditionally, and well-known lore for doctors and nurses and hospice workers. For another, there was the clock thing.

For yet another, this afternoon I suddenly fell apart in a crying jag that lasted for almost an hour. I could just FEEL something, and I couldn't stop sobbing. I've felt out of it all day, but this afternoon and evening were especially bad.

Cat felt it too. We actually planned a memorial service and green burial over the phone right after that, because we were both feeling weird. She thought her mother would be gone by the weekend, but hoped it might be sooner, because Sharn was starting to feel pain towards the end, and needed some morphine to feel more comfortable, and until the day before had not needed it.

As I was on the phone with Cat talking about her mother just dying, I noticed that the light from the hallway seemed to be getting brighter and brighter. I thought it was an electric thing, so just shrugged mentally at first. Then, I realized there was a feeling of comforting Presence, and the light was coming from a sort of luminous fog or smoke that was sort of spilling into my den's doorway. I figured out what it was and excused myself from the phone call.

I stood up and approached the oddly white stuff, and realized it was more astral that physical, but I still saw it physically. The 3 young cat siblings were basking in it. I began speaking to this presence, convinced it was Sharn, although not alone-- with an escort. Mind you, I could not see figures in the fog-light, it was too dense to make out the outlines of figures, but I could FEEL them. I said my good-byes and actually walked through it to go down the hallway. Sure enough-- the fog followed and so did the kitties. I spoke for a few minutes and thanked Sharn and gave her my love and promised her that Cat and I would be okay and figure things out. I reminded her to check out the "Singing Pyramids" in the afterlife realms that I told her about. Oh-- and she was welcome to join my aunt Ruth to escort me to the other side when it was my time to cross over. As soon as I said good-bye formally, the weird bright light mist dissolved quickly and the cats, utterly nonchalant, scattered as well.

It's funny how comfortable cats are with spirits...

My impression was that Sharn knew, given all my experiences I've related to her, that I would realize what was happening and not be either too confused or scared. (Cat did not experience anything like what I did, and she was her daughter and life-long friend.) As it was, I feel I rose to the challenge and got to address her-- though everything I said was pretty much things I've made sure to say at least a couple of times over the last year. Still, it was obvious she was happy and going to a good place! It was a holy light I saw-- though I would be hard-pressed to explain how I knew beyond common cultural beliefs. Like knowing she was with a spiritual escort... that part I just knew without knowing how I knew.

Point is, I know she's okay. Still existing in a different form, and still cares enough to make sure we know she's okay, because of course I told Cat EVERYTHING. It is very reassuring, even if we'll miss her 'down here' on the material plane.

Also--? It means Cat comes home tonight. She hasn't been home in 3 weeks and it is getting lonely around here!

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