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Jan. 20th, 2017


Two Yellow Spheres & Two Dark Men (April 1992)

A couple more strange things happened that late winter/early spring of 1992. Gerick and I were eager to have a place of our own, and I'm sure his parents realized that getting us out of the house would curb the activity disrupting their lives as well. When a rental came available in a house only a block or so away around the corner from his parents' house, Gerick and I were happy to make the move.

It was in March that we got our first apartment together. It was barely affordable, and too big since we didn't have much by way of furniture or belongings, but we didn't care. We just wanted our own space! The apartment was the top floor of a converted house from the turn of the century, built around 1890 or so, in an almost 'shotgun' style-- narrow with each room running into the next. There was a hall on the side of 3 rooms, and a stair to get downstairs, so it was a strange set up to my Western Coastal eyes, but I really loved the history of the older buildings. On this street, which was not so busy as the street Gerick's parents lived upon, huge old trees lined the road on both sides, making things very picturesque and lovely.

Despite its age, I never felt the presence of any ghosts during the 3 months we lived there. I was shocked to learn how many old houses are haunted in Lancaster and Logan, OH, but that old house was delightfully peaceful and the only noises we ever heard were from our downstairs neighbors.

Except for one night...

We weren't there very long, since we found a more affordable and modest apartment in another old house converted into apartments in May, but in the meantime there was one very memorable incident that proved the human-looking aliens were keeping tabs on us no matter where we lived!

It began that night when Gerick and I were in the kitchen after making dinner together. We were doing some dishes and talking when Gerick gasped that there were lights outside the windows! I looked quickly but barely saw something small and yellow flash up and out of sight. It was so fast I wasn't sure what I saw. Gerick said it was two tennis ball sized yellow lights.

Our apartment was on the second floor, and the back yard was dark, next to and facing other back yards. There was a narrow alley in the back, but no parking or access to cars that would face headlights into our direction. Besides, Gerick said the lights were no more than a foot from the window.

I wondered about that, feeling a bit nervous, but we had to get ready for bed soon, since Gerick had to get up early for work the next day. Leaving only a small stove light on, the rest of the lights were turned off and we went all the way to the far side of the house to get ready for bed. The apartment had a large spacious daylight kitchen with windows across the entire back wall, then there was a narrow room off the kitchen that could be a study-- but you had to walk through that to reach the hall with access to the bathroom at the top of the stairs or the red-carpeted bedroom, which was in front of the 'study'. Then in the very front of the apartment was another room full of tall windows that would be used as the living room by most people. For us it was both living and bed room, since we didn't have a bed yet. We were still sleeping on Gerick's large L-shaped sofa.

I realized I wanted a drink before bed and so wandered back into the kitchen, only turning on one small light. I opened the fridge and grabbed a drink and when I turned around, I saw, to my surprise, one yellow light ball, followed by another, come down from the ceiling! As I watched the tennis ball sized glowing orbs, I realized they weren't making any more light in the room, though they seemed make of light. I'd been seeing glowing orbs of various sizes since I was a kid. The yellow ones were often tennis-ball sized. Orange ones seemed to be beach-ball sized. White ones seemed the size of marbles. But it still shocked me to see these things just moving intelligently around the house. There were no thunder storms in the area-- it wasn't ball lightning or anything. The glowing balls were utterly silent and seemed to be remote viewing devices-- or at least that was my suspicion. One thing I knew was that they only showed up when the aliens were around.

I called out to Gerick and he came running, but the balls, first one, then the other, went right back up and through the solid ceiling as if they were not made of any sort of solid material at all. I'd noted that from past encounters as well. Gerick didn't see them, but I quickly described them coming right down into the kitchen from the ceiling and then going back up again. He believed me, and actually was relieved because now I had seen the two balls he'd seen earlier. They were definitely prowling around our apartment!

But then he just wanted to go to bed!

I was flabbergasted. I could never 'surrender' to sleep when I knew They were coming! How could he? But Gerick had developed a more congenial relationship with his group of abductors. He usually only saw the human looking ones since his late teens, and they were more gentle and less frightening, and he didn't mind seeing them so much, so he was willing to go to bed.

Me--? Not so much. I was scared, and I knew I'd be sitting up in vigil through the night. I wouldn't sleep a wink if I could help it. If I knew They were coming I would NOT be a easy target! When Gerick laid down to sleep and was soon out, I got a book and settled in against a pillow to read for hours, sipping a caffeinated drink to boot. The lights were all on in the living room while I slept and my boyfriend slept.

It was around 2 am and I was relaxed and deep into my book. I had actually stopped reading for a few minutes and was pondering some thoughts the story I read provoked, when I saw movement out of the corner of my eye. I was facing the doorway to the hall, so a quick flick of the eyes allowed me to note a dark figure, taller than Gerick, moving into the room and then stopping suddenly at the threshold. I barely looked up in time to see the dark-haired man pushed slightly forward, as if someone ran into him from behind, as if whoever was behind him did not expect to stop so suddenly. The man, dressed in almost skin tight black coveralls, quickly stepped backwards and turned, his arms going up to push someone behind him back down the hall. I heard a slight scuffle as this all happened before me.

I dropped the book and sat up, stunned. The man was wearing all black and he was slender, but he seemed totally human. A white man with black, short hair. The shadow behind him may have been another, shorter, man. But the hall was only lit by a dim nightlight (to get to the bathroom in the dark) so it was difficult to tell. No one had come up the stairs though, of that I was certain. The old stairs creaked, as did our front door. There was no way I would not have heard people coming up the stairs, so how did they show up so suddenly?

I should have been scared to death, but a strange, fierce energy filled me. An outrage at the trespass within my home. I shot to my feet, full of adrenaline and ready to rumble! I ran full speed across the room and followed the men down the hall!

By the time I reached the door, I knew where the two people had gone: they were in the side bedroom with the red carpeting that we never used. Why would they flee there? I wondered. I expected them to go down the stairs and out the front door! But I heard two hushed male voices talking to each other in that room, and I saw the door just slightly open itself wider as I reached the hall, as if I just missed someone going in. The voices were urgent and alarmed. Something had gone wrong-- and I knew what... I wasn't dreaming, just thinking, but I was awake and they weren't expecting that. It wasn't the first time I would shock the shit out of Gerick's human-looking alien group. I came to see some faces more than once, and heard voices often enough they became familiar to me. One of those two men was the being I started thinking of as Gerick's Dark Doppleganger, because he looked a great deal like Gerick, only with black hair and with tilted, slightly larger than normal eyes. His voice was even like Gerick's only deeper.

In any event, I didn't hesitate, I yelled for Gerick to wake up at the same moment I reached my hand through the doorway of the bedroom to flick the light on!

...........and no one was there!

That was impossible! I quickly checked the closet, as there was no furniture to hide behind. Then I ran to the hallway and turned the lights on and raced to the bathroom, the study, the kitchen-- no one, no one, no one! Gerick finally came out and asked what the hell was wrong and I explained that two men were just in the house. They went into the bedroom and just vanished!

They weren't ghosts either. Their clothing wasn't anything I'd ever seen anyone wear-- the closest thing would be a thin kind of wet suit. The yellow balls, followed by the disappearing visitors, was too obviously a different flavor of paranormal.

Gerick double checked everything before going back to sleep, and I finally was able to sleep, fitfully, only after the sun rose the next morning and I heard neighbors getting up for the day and heard traffic in the streets. Nothing is more eerie than facing oddities during the dark silence of night, all alone-- even if only by virtue of being the only one awake!

I think that was the first time I saw the Dark Doppleganger Guy, if you don't count the silhouette I saw in the room that tucked me in (I was told later that was him as well.) It was only a glimpse long enough to get the barest of impressions, but later meetings confirmed it was the same guy. At that time, it was just the height, build, hair, and sound of his voice that came across.

One thing was obvious from this encounter, as from a few others. The Others are in such a hurry that they can make some pretty big mistakes. They seem to monitor our thoughts and think its safe to come for us once we're asleep. Gerick taught me that you could simply get real relaxed and jumble your thoughts, sing some songs in your head, etc-- and it mimics a dreaming state closely enough that they can't tell the difference and you can catch them walking right in on you if you're brave enough to do such a thing. I didn't mean to, but I was tired and my mind was wondering from the book I'd been reading. When one of Them walked in and saw I was still awake, he evidently stopped, got run into by the guy behind him, turned, shoved that guy up the hall, and they ducked into the bedroom and then dematerialized somehow. "Beam me up, Scotty?" I guess so!

The whole incident gave me much to think about for years.

Jan. 13th, 2017


Coping Methods for Alien Abducions: Facing Dragonfear & Fear Zones

I've said that the first thing one needs to do when dealing with alien (or whatever they are) abductions is to start writing everything down. The second thing that needs to be dealt with is the overwhelming fear...

One aspect of being an abductee that is nearly impossible to explain fully to a 'civilian' is the fear, which is beyond the fear of facing a firearm held by a hostile person in the middle of a violent earthquake while knowing a bomb will drop any second. Unless they've felt that level of fear, let alone multiple times, most Westerners have no context with which to grasp what reality shattering fear actually is...

In fantasy novels with traditional, scary dragons, many describe a fear so profound upon facing a living, breathing dragon that it causes a paralysis of the mind and body, called "Dragonfear." Facing aliens means dealing with something very similar (though paralysis is most often imposed from the aliens, not our own fear) and so my ex husband came up with this term to describe abductee fear.

From the outsiders' perspective, aliens don't seem all that scary. Compare the way a Grey looks to most of our movie monsters and it seems downright silly to be scared of a short, skinny, bald dude with large eyes! But that's only because if you've never faced a powerfully telepathic being with incredibly sophisticated weaponry that can bend time and space-- you can't imagine how utterly petrifying it is until you've actually done it. Therefore, I attribute the lack of sympathy for this fear to a lack of imagination for most people.

Regardless, that fear is incredibly destructive and crippling, even long after the abduction is over. It causes weird, specific phobias, anxieties often related to being watched and overly vulnerable, and even Complex Developmental Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I was diagnosed with this officially myself. "Developmental" means the PTSD was acquired during childhood and/or adolescence (which means the brain is more firmly hard-wired and therefore its extra hard to treat.) "Complex" means from repeated, personal assaults-- for example, prisoners of war get Complex PTSD, or women trapped in extreme domestic violence. The worst of the worst is CDPTSD, and THAT is what alien abductees often get. Sadly, for most, it goes untreated because most of us know better than to admit what is causing our fears to medical and psychological professionals!

When I first faced Dragonfear in a conscious manner at 16 because I at last SAW what had made me so scared at night my entire life, I was suicidal. I decided that I would rather take my life than be taken by Them again.

I discussed my own battle dealing with Dragonfear here: spirals-end.livejournal.com/40686.html

What complicates matters is that the fear comes from 3 different sources:

1. The animal, physical fear of immediate harm.

You get the adrenaline rush whenever something happens that you know means "They" are either coming or there. This makes sense because you know you're about to be either knocked out and abducted or rushed at and overwhelmed. You know you have almost NO defense against it. It will happen and you're nearly helpless (I say 'almost' and 'nearly' because there are a few options you can use. More as posts continue.) Such a fear is expected. Its like being a prisoner of war-- you're going to get messed with, and you just have to brace for impact, because you can't fight, flee, or freeze. Its coming. THIS IS TERROR.

2. The sophisticated, intellectual comprehension of your deeper, more personal, vulnerabilities.

By this, I mean the realization of how your very MIND can be manipulated and overcome. The 'multiplying echo' effect of mutual mind reading when facing a powerful telepathic being described in the post indicated above is just one aspect of it. Its difficult to describe how hard it is to be mentally naked and utterly stripped of your innermost privacy. Beyond that is realizing that the same being who can see right through your soul can also make you do things against your will and even strip your memories so that you can't build an adequate understanding and defense. Once you know how helpless you are in the face of this, there is a stark fear for the most precious part of what makes you-- YOU. An incredible existential fear for the loss of agency one will undergo, over and over.  THIS IS HORROR.

'Dragonfear' is when extreme forms of both fears come together for a perfect storm of AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!

The last one is the hardest to describe, but well worth mentioning because its fascinating...

3. Artificially created 'Fear Zones' designed to prevent humans from entering an area, or to herd them towards another.

Generally speaking, the aliens try to calm us down from the first 2 types of fear, by projecting a type of 'holy calm' effect. After all, we're hard to control if we're trying to run away or attack them! The only exception I've run into or heard about is this third type.

John Keel in Mothman Prophesies found evidence of "fear zones" like a projected area where a human brain would automatically react with extreme fear. He could step into it and think he was going to die, take one step out of it, and be fine again. He experimented with it. In that case, it was a 'zone of fear' the Others put around an area they were working in to prevent humans from coming in (at the height of the Mothman case, people were running all over the countryside at night trying to see the Mothman.) Interestingly, later researchers ran into a similar effect that could be created using a type of infra-sound (or subaudible frequencies in sound waves.)

I've heard of several cases of abductees who ran away from aliens only to run into a 'fear zone'- then finding themselves running back in the direction of the aliens! I've had a couple of episodes of this nature myself. It seems rarely used, but as its associated with the Others, I think it deserves some attention.

Okay, so you're scared-- NOW WHAT?!?

Chronic fear is bad for us. We all know how chronic anxiety wreaks havoc on our physical and emotional well being- just try to imagine surviving on a much higher level of fear and its obvious the damage is inexcusable.

The worst thing about dealing with alien abduction fear is that it always seems to spill over into the rest of your life. Sleeping in a bed seems fraught with danger because THAT is where they most prefer to take you (seeing as how you really are the most helpless when asleep!) Other things that remind you of abductions may trigger phobias-- large eyes, white walls, sudden silences, dental and medical personnel and equipment...

Over time (especially since most of us are taken regularly from infancy) our brains are re-wired to detect threat far too easily and we just get scared more, more often, and too quickly. Then we're also much more difficult to calm afterwards. Our bodies deal with constant chemical cascades that damage immune systems and basic functioning. Our personalities can become difficult to deal with for others. Our ability to negotiate the normal ups and downs of life are compromised. We may be more likely to succumb to addiction or suicide.

Sweet deal to get that contact with intelligent life from other places, eh? Sign me up!

Seriously, many of my Coping Methods posts will be about various ways to deal with the overwhelming fear and subsequent general disability that arises from this set of circumstances. For now, I want to address the most overt things.

~ Realize that your fears are both natural and animal, but also sane, reasonable, and inevitable!

You cannot help your fear. Your reactions are the rational and biological reactions to very real threats that you've had to face since you were very young and even more helpless than you feel now as an adult. No one will automatically be able to shut that fear off, no matter how big and tough and intelligent they are. Your fear is real and powerful, and you'll be dancing with it probably forever.

You are not alone in your fear. Anyone in your shoes will feel the way you do and-- trust me!-- DOES feel the way you do. Small children sometimes cope better than buff, trained military men with intimate knowledge of firearms and combat tactics, probably because they don't understand what only an adult can regarding what alien contact means, given what's been explained above.

So don't bitch yourself out for daring to be scared to death. Don't pile self-censure and shame on top of the heaps of pain the fear-reaction is already guaranteed to give you in spades! Accept that your reaction of fear is expected and normal. Start there.

~ Take steps to confront and control as many aspects of abduction experiences as you can.

I'll be specifying more in future posts, but I've already outlined one: write down every memory or suspicious dream as soon as possible. You are dealing with an intelligent threat, and so communication and concession is possible. Also, there are techniques for getting around amnesia and building up emotional resistance that I'll be sharing. Too, most of the abduction experience takes place after you've been calmed down and the fear has already been subdued via artificial means.

No, we can't turn invisible, or move in sped-up time, or phase through solid objects-- but neither are we without resources. Knowledge is power in this case, and the more you know (and can learn!) the better you can shift up the power dynamic in your favor. You'll likely never be 'in charge' - but you don't have to be waiting helplessly by for the next abduction 'attack' either.

~ Address the stress your brain is under and take steps to remedy your anxieties and panic attacks.

You probably don't want to admit your alien abductions to a therapist (although there are lists of abduction-accepting ones if you can find one near-by and afford it) but you CAN admit you have anxiety and panic disorders. If that means therapy and medication, so be it! Ask for results-oriented therapy instead of cathartic (sharing memories and emotions) therapy, and if you feel you need to hedge and not address abductions, then don't. I never have! Instead, I've addressed "medical and dental traumas" without going into too much detail (although I DO have a couple of bad incidents that way I CAN discuss) and that seems to work just fine.

I also think using medication is entirely justified. Your traumas came from outside of you, so why can't treatment come the same way? Anti-anxiety meds seem more useful than anti-depressants (though doctors will push for the anti-depressants, they also often cause a flattening of ALL emotions as well as deeper sleep, which may make anxiety higher because you can't respond in an emergency to fight back). If you fall into an actual depression, then by all means get medicated help-- again, I did! But for general fear based upon REAL and ONGOING events and encounters, I don't find it particularly useful. (Unless, as stated before, you get overwhelmed and crash into clinical depression.)

Xanax and Ativan are the go-to anti-anxiety medications, and they work after 25 to 45 minutes and last a few hours. Take only when needed, don't overuse (or they lose effectiveness.) Its better to address extreme anxiety or fear (regardless of the source) rather than allow your brain to keep compounding more negative memories and reactions. Every panic attack makes another easier and worse. My biggest bitch with the pills is that they take a long time to work, and panic attacks are sudden and powerful.

If you live in a "Green State" or nation that allows marijuana legally, though, I've found the BEST medication is sublingual (absorbs through tissue) cannabis tinctures made to spray under the tongue! They work in 5 to 10 minutes and knock a panic attack out in its tracks. If you live where cannabis is only available medically, PTSD is covered and its worth it to get a prescription. Get one that's based on an INDICA (think "in da couch") strain, and some come with additional herbals like Kava kava or Valerian root, which is also helpful. The mouth sprays come in tiny canisters the size of lip balm, and are easily popped into a pocket or purse, very discreet, no smoking required to get the effect needed. By far, I've found these to be absolute miracle lifesavers when out in public! Highly recommended! And yes, I will give myself a spray when I think 'They' are coming so I can keep my cool as much as possible.

A little alcohol is okay to 'take the edge off,' but you have to be careful, and its not easy to take enough alcohol in a flask to shunt a panic attack away while out in public, although I know many people resort to this. Likewise, be careful of any other kind of 'downer', because you don't want to incapacitate yourself. Also stay well away from any stimulants, as they will compound and exacerbate any fear issues. Even be careful with caffeine! Drugs can be medicine or they can be poison, so proceed with caution! However, keep in mind that the natural fear your brain produces is also a kind a poison that causes damage, so don't avoid getting help for your poor, beleaguered brain!

For extreme, Complex PTSD, they are starting drug trials in some places of therapy combined with MDMA, MDA, and MDHA -- all forms of Ecstasy. Keep an eye out on research on this front, as I think there is real hope for many of us in this direction. I'll say no more, since these illegal drugs are a Class A controlled substance for now. Factoid: Ecstasy was actually developed after the Vietnam War specifically to help returning veterans with what we now call Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. 'Nuff said? Yeah...

~ Realize that though fear is natural, it does you absolutely NO GOOD with abductions. You can't fight or flee, only wait.

Which is to say, finding ways to inoculate yourself to fear and to adapt to functioning in the face of it is important. See what you can do to reduce it, but after that, learn to deal with it. Easier said than done, I know! --but there's really not much choice in the matter. You have to learn much of this by trial and error. Everyone's private coping methods will be different and suited to them.

Things that have helped me:

- Humor and whimsical silliness, including singing & dancing inappropriately while in waiting areas.
- Watching the scariest movies I could find, over and over (not slasher flicks, the 'other beings' kind.)
- Daring myself to do things that scare me (but are safe) until I move my comfort zone a little further out.
- Making sure I have flashlights & glow lights in several places in the house, including my night stand.
- Finding other abductees to talk to so I don't feel alone in dealing with these matters. Very crucial!

** Finally, a caveat to all above advice: Please don't sue me. I am NOT a medical professional and have NO business telling you what's best, yadda yadda. I'm just sharing my personal opinions based upon my own experience and am not legally any kind of expert. Use ideas with caution, etc. Blah blah blah, you know the drill.

Jan. 6th, 2017


Tucked In After Argument (Spring 1992)

I've already mentioned this memory briefly (see links below), but I though it deserved a more thorough report, because its one of the most interesting encounters I've ever had...

Living in the 3-bedroom, century old house with my then boyfriend and his parents was mostly normal. I got a job doing after-school daycare and though we had some weird nights that seemed suspicious, weeks passed without much going on in any obvious way.

It was early spring of '92 when the next blatently odd encounter occurred... Gerick and I had one of our first really horrible fights. Neither of us ever got physical, but he said some nasty things to me and I told him off for it, and we were so angry that we slept in separate rooms. You know the old adage about 'don't go to bed angry'? Well, for 2 young people with serious passions and easy resentment, that would mean no sleep at all, so for the next 23 years or so of living with Gerick, we'd get into a fight so bad that we wouldn't sleep in the same bed maybe once a year or so. Rare, but it happened.

That night was the first time, and I was distraught. I was so hurt, but I knew I couldn't just roll over and let myself be dominated. So I retired to the tiny room where I kept my things. It had a small twin bed I could use and I sadly curled up under the covers and cried myself to sleep, wondering how to fix things- or even if it could be fixed.

At some point in the night, I heard creaking footsteps in the hall and woke up. Back then, after so many abductions and odd events, I was a super light and anxious sleeper who woke up at the slightest noise.

The door opened and someone stood at the doorway. I wasn't scared because I thought it was Gerick. I waited, pretending to still be asleep. It was nearly a full moon, and the moonlight was streaming in the windows. I didn't have a night-light in that room, so opened curtains had to do.  I was able to see the shadow of a slender man once he was almost in front of me.

It was a cold night. Frosty. And old houses don't have the best insulation. I had one shoulder sticking out of the covers, and I wanted to pull covers over it to warm it up, but at the same time, I didn't want to give myself away to Gerick. To my surprise, the man knelt over me and pulled the covers up over my cold shoulder. He stroked my shoulder a little, gently, and I felt mental waves of concern and sadness wash over my mind. Just very worried and gentle thoughts, feeling bad that I felt bad, and wanting to help me... Then he tucked the edges in a little and lightly patted the covers into place.

He was so nice! And I still thought, even with the light telepathy, that it was Gerick. We'd had a few instances of sharing images or even words when both of us were really relaxed, so I just assumed that I was picking up on how sorry he was for being such a jerk to me earlier!

I was so relieved! Our fight was over! He realized he'd over-stepped and now we could be okay again!

The man stood upright and took a step back, and I could clearly see him silhouetted against the window. He stood there, looking at me for a couple of long minutes. I looked back, no longer worried that Gerick knew I was awake, though it was dark enough he may not have seen my eyes were open. However, I didn't feel the need to say anything. I thought, "Thank you" in my mind and the man quietly went to the door and closed it softly behind himself.

I sat up in bed then, feeling so grateful. I heard the steps creak on the stairs as the man evidently went down. I figured Gerick was going to get a drink or snack or something. I decided to leave things be until morning. I was comfortable, and it appeared things were okay. As I began to drift off, I heard Gerick's dad come out of his room to use the bathroom next to my room and then return to his room. I never heard Gerick come back up the stairs though. I fell asleep before I heard him return, contented that all was well.

The next morning, I got up and felt great. I remembered the great tenderness with which I'd been tucked in and so when I went into Gerick's bedroom, I was expecting him to be all sorry and gentle like he was the night before...!

Imagine my surprise when what I got was a scowl and curt words! I looked at him, utterly bewildered by his shift backwards, "Well, what's wrong now?" I wailed. He was still upset about the night before. I then asked him why he changed his mind when he was so sorry last night!

Now he was confused! He said he wasn't sorry at all! I asked him why he came into my room to tuck me in last night, then?

At that point, Gerick looked at me like I was crazy. And I could tell he wasn't joking... He was still riled up and in NO mood to even touch me, let alone apologize! I slowly realized that the man in my room the night before wasn't Gerick. I already knew it wasn't his father, because after I heard the man go downstairs, Gerick's dad came out of his room a few minutes later to use the bathroom, and no one had come back UP the stairs...!

Then I realized the telepathic sympathy was too strong, clear, and unlike anything I'd ever had with Gerick! I felt so stupid! How could I mistake an encounter with a human-looking alien (or hybrid) for one with an abductee?!?! In retrospect, it was painfully obvious that no normal man had come into my room!

Because that was around the time I saw the Blond human-alien that later came to be called Ethan, I always assumed it was him. The encounter was so sweet that I must confess I got a little crush on him after that. There was compassion and kindness and tenderness completely unfaked, and it made me feel more kindly towards the human-looking ones.

It wasn't until years later that I learned the identity of the man who came into my room and tucked me in that night (you'll note a summation of this memory already there):

More here as well: http://spirals-end.livejournal.com/26371.html

Dec. 30th, 2016


Coping Methods for Alien Abducions: Keep Records & Write It Down!

If you happen to be a reader who knows they're an alien abductee (because they've had witnesses and/or seen these entities while wide awake without memory impairment AND have no conditions that include hallucinations, etc.) or even if you strongly suspect you may be an abductee because of a long list of suspicious dreams, partial memories, odd physical evidence, etc., then you'll probably appreciate where nearly half of my future posts are going for a while.

When I first realized I was in regular contact with aliens, I would have donated an organ to have some real, practical advice on what to do. I had no such resources unfortunately, as researchers were too busy sharing information and trying to prove it was really happening to provide much in the way of direction for those of us 'in the trenches.' So what I'm going to pass on I learned the hard way, via trial and error and a whole lot of stubbornness!

~ The FIRST thing you need to do, regardless of whether you know or suspect you're an abductee/experiencer, is to find a journal (online, on a computer, or on paper) to start recording every single weird thing that happens to you. And I mean every one. Whether its a suspicious dream, a UFO sighting, an odd encounter with a strange person that gave you the willies, whatever!

It may seem like a small anomaly that means little or nothing, but get in the habit of writing it down as if its a personal law that you're not allowed to break. You don't have to be paranoid and obsessed -- in fact, this simple act of recording what happens as it happens allows you to go back to your normal life quickly and put it out of your mind in order to function as you must to get by day to day.

This recording process require 2 parts. You need to get a paper notebook next to where you sleep. Or an old-fashioned magnetic tape mini tape recorder. Why hard copy or tape? Because digital is too easy to erase and mess up when you're half asleep! You can transfer anything later when you're wide awake to any format you want, but something simple and hard to screw up remotely via electronic failure is your best bet. Even if its just a bunch of notes, badly written-- so long as its something that can help you remember things later. Make sure you have a writing utensil with the paper journal as well, or fresh batteries next to your tape recorder.

Then write down or record any dreams or night-time events that bother you. Just that.

~ The SECOND thing you need to do is find a way to copy, share, or create a secondary record for you to go over anything and write in more detail when you're fully cogent. Thus, you'll be able to thoughtfully evaluate what memories and evidence you've experienced. I use a paper diary to begin with, then I elaborate upon my first pass via online journals. I figure if I somehow 'lose' my paper diary, I have a back-up with multiple witnesses as a fail safe!

~ Next, buy a giant desk calendar and hang it on a wall in a prominent place (maybe a bedroom wall or something?) Mark all weird events, dreams, etc., especially when you find yourself in an active 'flap' period. (A simple wall calendar will do, but I suppose it depends upon how small you can write!) Write down normal appointments stuff, to-do lists, and so forth, but use different colored ink as a code-- like purple for dreams, green for UFO sightings, red for seeing beings, etc. The idea here is to give yourself a visual aid. You'll see patterns emerge quickly, and the Others often miss its purpose since its mixed in with just keeping track of normal stuff. (Yeah they care... you'll see!)

I realize in today's 'everything digital' habit patterns that this may seem quaint and cumbersome, but hear me out. Having a place to keep track of things over time, on paper, that requires NO need to search through various apps, is a much better, regular way to quickly keep track. It takes little money or effort. All you need do is pass by the calendar and glance at it to notice how things are going. When things are normal, it quietly hums away in the background of your consciousness. When a new active period starts up, you'll see where you're at and begin to be able to predict where events are likely to go next. This enables you to have some sense of mastery over an area of your life that likely bewilders and frightens you. Anything that lessens the feeling of floating helplessly through it all is helpful. Between the calendar and the journals, you'll be able to make sense of things and put together plans much more easily.

For example, using the above techniques, I discovered that as a flap commenced, I became suddenly obsessed with UFOs and aliens for days or weeks after not thinking about them at all for months, even years at a time. Then I would have one or more visits/abductions. When there were multiple visits/abductions, poltergeist activity would break out, especially in cases where I noted that they came to me through a portal made directly into my home rather than, say, knocking on my door and leading me out a little distance away and then beaming me aboard or something.

Simply writing down a bunch of weird details over time allowed me to make observations and come to some conclusions regarding what to expect and what was causing what. This, in turn, allowed me to make some choices and change my strategy as needed where I could.

In point of fact, writing things down and then comparing notes in this way is using the fundamentals of the scientific method. When you confront the raw data from your own experiences, you soon realize that some assumptions you may have made were true, others were false, and new ideas and theories begin to form based on a much more solid foundation. So most 'real' scientists are too invested in materialism and the limitations of our current technological paradigms to take any of our reports seriously-? So what? No one said you couldn't use rational, logical approaches in order to investigate and learn from your own life!

~ Once you make the decision to start recording and evaluating your own strange encounters, you begin to accept some responsibility for dealing with the phenomena you're involved with. This is not to say its your fault, but rather that you are refusing to just 'take it' passively anymore! You are embarking on a journey that accepts that your path in life is a little less common and you've decided to use it as an opportunity to learn more about this frightening and fascinating reality.

You stop being a victim and start being an investigator! Okay... you'll still be a victim, but not just a victim. You're a victim with tools and teeth! You're a victim with a mind and a method! You won't be waiting in dread for the next occurance, but rather waiting to pounce upon every opportunity to seize more information!

There are distinct advantages to this approach. Besides what I've already mentioned, you know that you're sincere. You know you're telling yourself the truth as best you can. You don't have to worry if you're hoaxing yourself. You can move on to the "now what the hell is going on here" phase right away. Other people hearing your reports don't have that prior knowledge and of course they may doubt-- that is their perogative. And if you decide to share your information, you just have to learn somehow not to take that doubt personally. There are a lot of liars and hoaxers in this crazy world. It sucks, but that's the reality. There are also a lot of sincerely mistaken people who jumped to conclusions without testing things out the way you will if you undertake a serious investigation into your own experiences.

** PRO TIP: Write everything down as soon as possible!!! Don't procrastinate and wait another hour, day, week to record it. For one thing, you'll sometimes forget altogether, trust me! For another, minute but crucial details in your memory will be lost forever the longer you put it off. The sooner you can write down a complete recording of the event or encounter, the better! Be ruthless with yourself on this point! Its hard, especially when you feel overwhelmed, but get it recorded!

Best case scenario--? You may discover you're not an abductee at all! (Trust me, that's the best case.) You may find that you're over-analizing things with a wild imagination and a little paranoia or wishful thinking. (I don't think anyone who really has abductions wishes for it...) Or maybe you find that, actually, its a family member or roommate who is on the target list, and you just got caught up in the crossfire a little. That's fine! What a relief!

Worst case scenario--? You may discover that, well, actually there is no evidence to back anything up. Maybe you're genuinely mentally ill with schizophrenia or having temporal lobe seizures or something. In such a case, you've found out what ELSE is causing the issues, if not visits and abductions from aliens. Maybe you just have an actively haunted house. Maybe there's a faery infestation on your land. A lot of things, taken out of context, may look at first blush like an abduction. Skeptics are right to point out alternative scenarios. Anything's possible! But at least at that point you can begin to address what the real issue is and find yourself some relief, whether through medical tests and subsequent treatments, or a priest or shaman who can assist you with a spiritual/non-material matter.

The only way to know for sure is to start paying attention and writing it all down. Everything else manifests from that single point.

* Any abductee who wants to share what they discovered by writing down experiences, please feel free to comment, even anonymously!

Dec. 23rd, 2016


Interdimensional Bigfoot & Green Flashes

I'm more of a paranormal generalist than a specialist. Probably good to announce that up front. I'm an alien abductee, yes, but I've also seen and experienced many strange things. Actually, many abductees do. Its like we're 'contaminated' after one too many contacts with the aliens (or whatever they are).

I'm always on the lookout for new angles to consider. My approach, aside from some obvious judgment calls, is to neither believe nor disbelieve anything in particular. I prefer to remain open and keep looking for answers. The problem with belief is that once you choose a belief, you tend to place your bets and then it gets harder to change your mind or even consider new information. Everyone gets hung up on being found RIGHT instead of actually trying to find what is right. I myself have changed my mind several times on what I thought was going on. I will probably change it several more times, and I've learned to be okay with that.

One of the reasons I adore the rare generalist researchers like the late John Keel is that they notice and actually document how many of the anomalies of the world are cross-contaminated, like 'hot zones' during a UFO flap tend to have more bigfoot sightings along with other odd creatures that aren't supposed to exist, plus more poltergeist phenomena, psychic dreams and all sorts of crazy things for a duration of time while the flap is occurring, only to diminish and disappear (or at least slow way down) later.

I tend to suspect that other worlds or dimensions cross with our own at certain times and places, and that perhaps these 'leaks' or 'pops' allow other things to 'slide' over as well. Ghosts can more easily manifest, for instance. In general, shit just gets weird for a while.

Over time, I'm beginning to conclude (although the jury is still out) that two reasons why so many odd things have happened to me or around me over the course of my life, no matter where I life or how I live, has to do with those pesky aliens. I think they use inter-dimensional technology to cloak themselves, move in sped up time, move through solid walls, and create shortcut 'portals' from ships to abductees' homes. These technologies have an unfortunate side-effect of creating Weird Zones where other things can bleed through. In addition, I think repeated exposure to these technologies change abductees over time so that we ourselves become less-- solid and mundane. Especially right after being around Them, we are extra psychic and prone to anomalous experiences that have nothing to do with aliens.

That's my best guess at this point anyways. I don't know if the aliens are from our physical universe and just navigate through it using these dimensional bending technologies, or if they are actually from another dimension and 'translating' themselves here using those same technologies. They don't seem to be eager to tell the truth on that score, so I'm not too hung up on the answer. They're real, and they're here, and when they come they leave a little chaos in their wake.

I've been enjoying a couple of generalist researchers quite a bit lately, Greg Newkirk and his wife Dana Mathews, of Week In Weird. They travel and investigate EVERYTHING. Ghosts & haunted objects, UFOS, and even Bigfoot. Recently, they posted a most intriguing article about some experiences that led them to believe Bigfoot is an interdimensional creature (they say 'ghost' but they mean not truly of our physical world.)

That article here:

I'm also impressed by their mentioning the whole Green Flash anomaly! I myself have only seen that a few times, like a great flashbulb in the sky going off somewhere. In mythology, this was a sign of Faeries, and it was called The Green Ray. Very worth consideration, to my way of thinking!

I'm also glad to see the 'stubborn secrets' aspect of paranormal research finally getting some holes poked in it. Far too often, crucial facts (like things or animals or people disappearing into thin air, or strange lights being seen) are left out of reports because True Believers have this set notion about what is SUPPOSED to happen according to their own paradigm, so anything that is inconsistent with that is censored. John Keel noted this way back in the '60s, and we still haven't learned our lesson.

Too often, people in the various branches of paranormal research are too invested in propping up their own pet theories and proving themselves right-- instead of keeping their curiosity and looking for the answers. I have a feeling that if all the various areas of anomaly research just listened to each other, we'd be closer to many more answers than we are right now.

Good on Dana and Greg for outing their improper findings! I have way more respect for people who report everything that happened, not just what's deemed 'acceptable' by limited individuals determined to meet the demands of the prevailing consensus of their pet areas of study.

Dec. 18th, 2016


Returned Book & Purloined Coloring Books!

You'll never guess what happened today...

That co-housing book I wanted back? That disappeared from my bedroom, from the specific place I put it?


No kidding! Placed carefully in my closet in the OTHER room where I would be sure to find it-- and nowhere near where I actually left it. Having carefully unpacked everything I own, and placing those things in specific assigned spots AND on top of that having searched my entire domain at least 18 times, over and over again, there is no way I would have missed that large book in the awkward and obvious spot where I found it this morning.

But that's not the end of the news...

See, I had given up on finding that book again, like-- ever, and was happily wrapping presents for people. I reached up in the den closet for where the coloring books I bought my sister were carefully placed weeks ago. They were there whenever I looked for my co-housing book as well. I would think, "I gotta wrap and send those in time for Xmas!" I had them stored on top of my own coloring books, with coloring pencils and pens on top of them.

Now the coloring books, both my sister's and mine, are gone!

Mind you, the coloring pencils and other implements were still in the exact place I left them, only the adult coloring books are missing. I mean, its obvious. What's more, they were there just last week. The co-housing book was placed next to where the coloring books disappeared from, standing up and leaned against a box, facing outwards on the shelf, like "Hello, here I am!"

OH-! And that's not the only thing that was returned! On top of the co-housing book was a couple of my divorce legal papers! I didn't even know they were missing, as all of THOSE papers were labeled and filed away in my filing cabinet months ago. I put them away and didn't even worry about them anymore. When I checked (after finding them on the co-housing book) though, those divorce papers were no longer in my files where I left them, so they were definitely moved!


I recall talking to some guy about the co-housing book, and I barely recall talking about my divorce, but I don't remember retrieving any legal papers and handing them over. I'm so stunned and stymied. I can't begin to understand all of this!

If my roomies were even slightly inclined towards practical jokes, I might suspect them, despite my feeble bits of memory. But Sharn is nearly 80, and disabled, and can't reach the shelves in my closet where I had the coloring books and where the co-housing book was placed (facing outwards, not laying down-- so one couldn't miss it if they opened the closet, and not something I would do.) She walks with a cane and needs help with getting certain things from shelves and such. Cat, on the other hand, is literally too honest. Being an Aspie (Asperger's Syndrome) she doesn't lie. She'd just fess up the first thing if I asked (and for the record, I did.) She's been like that since I've known her. Neither of them would borrow and return things like books on housing or coloring books-- Sharn can't color, she has a tremor, and Cat is so busy these days she barely has time to sleep, let alone color or study housing (which is not something she cares about anyways.)

It has now been blatantly confirmed that my book was taken by Them, then returned (Did THEY copy it?) -- next to a small stack of art stuff, some of which I'm assuming they took as well. Will those then be returned? What new game is this? A test? Just goofing off? I wish I could remember more!

I'm very happy to get my co-housing book returned, in any event. Its the same one, with my own drawings and maps inside. There is an additional bend in the book's cover, which wasn't there before (paper-back) but otherwise its in good shape. My divorce papers were returned in awful shape-- out of order and severely bent and curled, but I don't care so much about that.

The coloring books aren't as big of a deal to me. I'd like them back, two of them were for my sister after all! But I can replace them, and the few I colored in aren't precious to me or whatever. Not like all the maps and stuff in my other book (which is out of print and available off and on as used copies pop up) called, "Rebuilding Community in America: Housing for Ecological Living, Personal Empowerment, and the New Extended Family" by Ken Norwood & Kathleen Smith. THAT I was livid to lose!

Maybe They don't want to piss me off that much. That notion intrigues me. But then why did they take the coloring books? I would have bought them some new ones if they wanted 'em so much. Just let me know consciously that you want them and I'll get some. No need to steal every damn thing!

I'm just going to shake my head for, like, a month after this. I just do NOT get it...

Dec. 16th, 2016


Appearance of the Blond Man (Autumn/Winter 1991)

Labor Day weekend of 1991, when I was all of 21 years old, I got on a plane and flew to Columbus, Ohio, where a young man (I've been calling Gerick in my blogs) who'd become a very close friend of mine (and more) was expecting me. We'd been corresponding via mailed letters and long phone calls for over a year at that point, and though it seemed foolish, it felt right to me. I wasn't in love, but I was ready to try something different and get some on-hands support from someone going through the same craziness as I regarding aliens. Facing devastating personal shocks without any emotional support was just too hard for both of us. We came together in order to stand back to back.

There was a bit of culture shock to begin with, given that the Appalachian foothills are a very different sort of place than the Pacific Northwest. Yet there were similarities between our families. We were both from working class families, though his were salt-of-the-earth, nose-to-the-grindstone skilled workers and mine were frustrated college dropouts who filled my house with books, we understood some realities about how hard life can be, and tended to come at most issues with a similar grim yet practical mindset.

Gerick and I had discussed the likelihood that two abductees being together would mean twice the encounters and overall weirdness, and yet still we preferred to face more events if it meant not facing them alone.

I had grown up surrounded by strange events and the subsequent phobias and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder that resulted from them, yet my parents, who also showed signs of trauma, had rarely taken me seriously and only ever sought to downplay the possibility that anything happening could be more than dreams or imagination. By the time I saw aliens while wide awake without any mental distortions (meaning alien-induced amnesia) at the age of 16, I had given up on ever broaching the subject with them. They would even watch a paranormal program on TV every now and again, but only treated the subject as a fascinating notion to ponder. It was odd to me, both my parents thought ghosts were possible, and reincarnation, and had even seen UFOs and thought aliens could very well be around, but they drew a line at the idea of them messing around with people. When those programs came up, my parents would change the channel! Subject avoidance... when people who are curious about strange unexplained things refuse to look at just ONE topic--! Well, it made me wonder, given how abductions tend to run in families and my few memories where my mother, at least, was involved.

Gerick's parents were skeptical, too, but they had come a lot further along. Mainly because Gerick had contacted Budd Hopkins, of Missing Time and Intruders fame, saving up money to travel to New York two summers in a row, get hypnosis, attend support groups, and befriend several abductees. His father and he got into screaming matches over it, but Gerick was determined and after a couple of years, his parents begrudgingly agreed at least that something strange was going on. They even started to report odd events they noticed to their son.

For instance, one day around the time I moved in, they reported hearing what sounded like a dozen kids running really fast around the house, in footfalls too light and soft to be adult people. They knew what that probably meant, but they discussed it openly with Gerick and myself, saying that when Gerick's dad got up to check, they found us fast asleep.

Yes, I flew across the country to move in with Gerick and his parents! We were hoping to move out on our own within a few months (and we did) but to begin with, I had a small twin bed and space I could use in a spare room. Most nights I stayed with Gerick in his room. He had a large, blue, L-shaped pull-out sofa. The mattresses on those things are terrible, and I really couldn't sleep on it given my pain issues, so we often ended up sleeping on two sides of the sofa-- it was certainly long enough to accommodate us!

It was on one of those nights early on when I awoke in the middle of the night for a few seconds, hearing what sounded like Gerick begging someone for something, "Please! Come on!" However, I couldn't seem to shake the lethargy that was gripping me. The next morning, Gerick told me a blond man, well-built and muscular, had come for a visit. They had shared some close bond, and when it was 'time' for the guy to make Gerick forget the visit, Gerick threw himself on the man's legs and begged him to not take away his memory! Evidently, the begging worked, because my boyfriend was able to remember the entire event. Mostly just talking, and some of it talking about ME being there and why. I was not happy, as I had not been able to fight the sleepiness. Normally, I am a very light and nervous sleeper, which makes sense!-- and so it was obvious to me that the man had used some sort of mechanism or power to induce deep sleep on me, something I'd seen them do to other people and knew them to have done to me.

It made me scratch my head, as I had never seen alien "Blonds" before-- at least not that I remembered! Gerick had started seeing human-looking people in association with his abductions off and on his whole life, as well as Greys. I had only ever recalled Greys and obvious mixed hybrids of Greys and humans. Encounters with the human-looking beings (were they abductees themselves? more human hybrids?) seemed to have a different, more humane, tone than the all-business Greys. Still, I was assured they were far less frightening than Greys, and so I was more curious than frightened.

Sometime in December, just after the tree was put up and trimmed, I got to have my first visual confirmation of the Blonds' existence.

It was cold and dark out, and I was cozied up on the sofa in the front parlor (old-fashioned, turn of the century, narrow lot house) with Gerick's dog, Peanut, watching TV. A shadow was cast from the porch light on the covered porch, and then I heard the storm door creaking open. Gerick was from a large family with 7 other siblings and their families, so I was used to unannounced visitors at all times of the day and evening. I thought nothing of it, expecting a knock or doorbell sound any moment.

But none came.

I was caught up in the program I was watching, and so didn't pay it much mind, but then I noticed that Peanut was watching the front door with wide, alert eyes. She was a dachshund mix, and older and well-behaved, but-- like many pets of abductees-- leery of certain things. It occurred to me looking at her that no one had knocked, and I realized it had been a couple of minutes already!

So, shaking my head in confusion, I got up to check things out...

... and a shadow (cast by the porch light into the dim living room) moved and I then heard the storm door creaking shut. By the time I disentangled my legs from the blanket I was under and got to the front door, I could only see the retreating back of a tall, blond man. I called out to Gerick, because something wasn't right. Someone had come to the door and opened the storm door and then just stared into the house for a couple of minutes before leaving again!

I opened the front door and called out, "Hello? Can I help you?" Gerick was in the bathroom, and I called to him, saying there was a man and to come out. He called back and I could hear him moving around.

Meanwhile, the retreating man didn't turn around, didn't look back. Gerick had a couple of blond brothers, but they were medium height and very slender. The guy I watched retreat was built almost like a body builder. Very solid! His clothes were dark and nothing stood out that grabbed my attention. At the time I was coming out to the front porch to follow him a ways, I didn't think about it being a "Blond". I thought maybe it was someone lost. Or maybe it was a peeping tom and I needed to see his face to report him to police. I tried to make note of his looks in the dark for that purpose. He had sort of a pageboy type haircut, only more casual, However, I could make out no further details of his face, as he steadfastly refused to look back.

I was in bare feet, and at the edge of the wooden porch, I realized it would be painful to follow on foot any further. Gerick finally was coming out of the bathroom, hurrying to me. I noticed how there was no traffic, even on the main road. Everything was sort of extra still, and eerie. It wasn't that late at night and we were only a block from a very main thoroughfare. That bizarre, otherworldly feeling was evident, but I didn't get why. I still thought it was just some creep walking away from the house down the sidewalk.

When Gerick opened the front door and came out to join me, I turned to look at him, and then turned to look back, and the blond man, who had been rapidly retreating, was gone. I guessed that he turned up an alley, but I wasn't certain. I quickly told Gerick what happened as I went back inside the house, and he shook his head. He pointed out that my description matched the guy who had been in his bedroom only a month or so prior!

(There is much more that happened in that house without me being around, but that is Gerick's story to tell, and so I will leave what I've heard on that account for him to share, or not!-- someday as he chooses.)

It was just the beginning of a very active period that would change entirely the way I viewed the aliens and our future forever

Dec. 9th, 2016


Coping & Strategies For Dealing With Alien Abductions

Starting today and continuing every other Friday, I'll be sharing what I've learned regarding how to handle alien abductions. I've been attempting various methods since my late teens (way back in the '80s) and over the years I've managed to eke out a few stratagies that alleviate negative situations and address the ongoing imposed amnesia issue.

Dealing with lack of knowledge about what is going on in your own life due to outwardly imposed amnesia is a wicked problem that we abductees all deal with universally. The aliens seem to not only get us to forget on demand, they seem able to make us remember any accidental bits and pieces as dreams. I suspect this involves brain wave manipulation, due to one significant event in my 20s where I was in the 'dream-mode' and popped out of it into normal consciousness in a continuous flow of memory. (Really learned a lot from that incident, which will be shared soon.)

In any event, there are 'tricks' you can use while in that dream-mode (where you're actually awake, but perceiving reality differently) to signal to your everyday waking self that it was a real event. Or, if you don't remember any of it, you'll know something happened. I'll be going over those ideas.

Then there's dealing with these telepathic, mind-controling aliens or hybrids! More issues, more strategies. Emotional control when confronted with fear that can be absolutely over-the-top is difficult to acquire, but there are ways to switch things up a bit and wrest a little control back over yourself rather than go into full-on panic mode.

Once you get those basics working, you can start to try to find out more about what is going on with them. What are they doing with you? What are they getting you to do? Keeping track of things as best you can and keeping a record of events, dates, and whatever you can remember is a good idea.

Finally, there's dealing with the aftermath... PTSD for most of us. Many phobias (of doctors and dentists is a common one) and general anxiety and some odd reactions and behaviors leave a legacy we have to deal with whether we remember much of what the aliens did to us or with us-- or not!

Unlike most traumas, alien abductions involve ongoing, unpredictable, secretive abuse. It never ends completely, though it does slow down for most of us after youth and even more after menopause or eldership. Confronting that reality isn't easy, but its the only way to learn to survive in some way with our grossly imposed upon realities.

In the meantime, here are some previous posts where I address many of these issues, to give you an idea of what I'll be discussing more of soon:

Mantid Encounter-- Touching & Sign-Leaving: http://spirals-end.livejournal.com/5780.html

Acting Goofy Around Greys-- Using Behavior To Shake Things Up: http://spirals-end.livejournal.com/8182.html

Mirror Memory Trick During Blond Encounter: http://spirals-end.livejournal.com/10719.html

Requesting Aliens Meet Outside, Not Take Me From Bed: http://spirals-end.livejournal.com/15483.html

Signals To Myself To Trigger Memories: http://spirals-end.livejournal.com/17112.html

Dealing With Power Failures Due To Interference: http://spirals-end.livejournal.com/18053.html

Taking Careful Notes With UFO Sightings: http://spirals-end.livejournal.com/22699.html

Dealing With Realizing Aliens Abductions Are A Part of Your Life: http://spirals-end.livejournal.com/43400.html

Hopefully, this previous work will help everyone know what I'm talking about regarding coping.

More to come in 2 weeks!

Dec. 6th, 2016


Patreon Page Officially Launched!

Okay-- I did it!

There were some glitches there for a time, but now I think I've figured out at least half of what I need to know (the rest will come later, like figuring out account stuff, doing taxes, etc.)

Patreon is a site that allows ongoing donations in modest amounts every month. Patrons can donate $1 a month up to whatever they wish. Higher levels of patronage grant more 'goodies' for donors to get as rewards for their support. Unlike Kickstarter, its not about one-time larger grants. Its also not a charity site like "Go Fund Me." Its a partnership of people who believe in what the writer, artist, inventor, musician is doing and wants to help them do it. But in return, the "creators" have to produce!

Go ahead and check it out if you're curious:  https://www.patreon.com/lucretiaheart

It appears that Patreon takes out 10% for their services, which is higher than GoFundMe (which is about 6% as I recall), but they have several extras that can be helpful too. Like document delivery services and holds on larger funds until they're covered.

I first heard of Patreon while listening to podcasts that I love, and I wondered about it, but didn't check it out until encouraged to do so by a reader who has already become a patron on my first day after Launch!

My first project I'm working on is right here, so most of my writing focus will be on At Spiral's End until I complete the bulk of this years-long endeavor. I'm nearly there, and will hopefully finish by late next spring. Sooner if I really stay on top of it. This has been a challenging blog to keep at, as I apparently have weird blocks to sharing some of my experiences and information. But I'll plow through and 'git 'er done' dammit!

And hey, if you want to support my writing projects, do feel free to become a patron yourself! Its easy and you can help with as little as a single dollar a month if you want!

Dec. 1st, 2016


20s Abduction Memories & Coping Methods Entries Commence

As promised, I'm beginning my memoir entries again. Every other week on Fridays, I'll be posting about incidents from my 20s (the 1990s) starting next week. On the other weeks, I'll be writing about strategies one can use when dealing with aliens (or whatever they are) that can gain you a little more self-power in interactions.

1991 to 1996 was a very active period, and I'm sure I won't recall every single thing. It helps that I kept journals since I was 8 years old, and by my 20s it had become an absolute compulsion! That makes it much easier to do this, because I can read back over the most dramatic things (which I DID write about) and share them with little loss of memory details. Sometimes reading back over those older paper diaries suprises even me. Memory does decay, and without having my fresh recall recorded at the time, these memoirs would not be even half as detailed.

You're welcome!

From '96 to 2005, however, things went so quiet that I only had a couple of remembered incidents. It seemed I was only picked up for 'check-ups' once a year or so, still most often in the summer. By 2005, when things picked up again dramatically for a couple of years, I was writing in online blogs and all of that has been recorded here already, and we'll be caught up to the present.

I presume after this that I'll be recording anything new as it happens and discussing abduction news, etc. I will also be rewriting my entries for another blog, which will have to be re-established, as apparently it got taken down?? Later, I will be polishing up all of this into a book format for possible publishing. Not everyone wants to go searching through blogs for this information, and I think it would be good to have mulitple hardcopies of my abduction memoirs and commentary. Anyway, its a goal!

Finally, before my next memory post, here's the last 3 entries from my early 20s, when I went on a roadtrip with Gerick, my now-ex husband through Oregon. After that, I moved to Ohio for a couple of years, which is where the memoirs will pick up.

Run-Up To A Roadtrip with Abductees: http://spirals-end.livejournal.com/54184.html

Roadtrip, Beach Encounters: http://spirals-end.livejournal.com/54291.html

Roadtrip, Desert Encounters: http://spirals-end.livejournal.com/54622.html

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